Last updated on April 6th, 2024

“Cultivate the habit of being grateful for every good thing that comes to you. And to give thanks continuously.”

—Ralph Waldo Emerson

During holidays that center around family and feasting, like Thanksgiving (my favorite), we often express gratitude. Yet, did you know that of all of the research-backed strategies for resilience and well-being, “the gratitude habit” reigns supreme?

Benefits of gratitude

People who routinely express gratitude are happier, healthier, and better able to bounce back from the everyday stresses that cause wear-and-tear on us physiologically and emotionally.

Managers who express gratitude have better retention of employees because they help to create a healthier workplace for everyone.

Intuitively, we know that gratitude helps us. Our religious and humanistic traditions underscore the value of gratitude. The science on the benefits of gratitude is clear and voluminous.

Yet, how often do you express gratitude? How do you show it? The research also demonstrates that it is not easy to build a gratitude habit, even though it is overwhelmingly good for us! Like eating healthy, getting sufficient sleep, and exercising, we must be deliberate about practicing gratitude.

There is not a “one-size-fits-all” approach to gratitude

Fortunately, as with many other habits that contribute to a rich, fulfilling life, there is not a one-size-fits-all approach. You can tailor gratitude to fit your personality and lifestyle.

You can keep a gratitude journal every night or write what you are thankful for in your planner each morning. You can say a blessing at your meals that includes a gratitude.

You can do it differently on different days, though it helps to have some regularity to your strategy because it is easier to maintain. Paying attention to whom you might express an extra thank you to is another approach. What small things can you notice more, such as a gentle breeze on your cheeks or the smell of coffee brewing in your kitchen?

Research has found, too, that it may be better to express gratitude a few times a week rather than every day. When you do it a little less often (but still regularly), you are less likely to repeat yourself. Also, the practice might be more energizing and less likely to become like wallpaper.

Be specific about what you are grateful for

Another key research finding is that it helps to be very specific. Rather than being grateful for “your family,” you can be thankful that “I got to talk with my mom on the phone.” Or you may be appreciative that “my husband and I spent a nice evening at home complete with a fire in the fireplace and a glass of wine.”

It also helps to be on the lookout daily for new things for which to be grateful, to actively scan your life daily for what is good.

Now’s a great time to kick start your “attitude of gratitude”

Is it time for you to re-boot your “attitude of gratitude?” I know that mine often needs a kick start, as it is easy to fall into the habit of thinking about “what went wrong” instead of “what went well.”

Finally, I want to add that this is not about being a “Pollyanna” or a super annoying cock-eyed optimist. As humans, we are meant to experience the full range of emotions. We don’t get the peaks without the valleys. But it benefits us and others to intentionally appreciate the good things in our lives.

We want to cultivate the 3:1 or 5:1 ratio of positives to negatives essential for optimal well-being. So if a lot of things have been going wrong, we need to remind ourselves of the many things that are going right that we perhaps take for granted.

So what will be your strategy for cultivating more gratitude in your life? What will you try? How will you track this habit? Leave a comment!